What a Bunch of Bullshi*t

As Pacenti reports, the Senate placed Kathy Williams nomination on its "consent calendar."

Whatever that means.

Senator Nelson's office offers this wisdom: "Williams’ confirmation is imminent as long as there are no objections."

No shit, Sherlock. Ya' think?

Man, despite her veneer of unflappability, this has to be difficult on Kathy. And it underscores again that politics prevents good people from putting their lives on hold to seek appointment to the Bench or some other important position.

Fortunately for the Southern District, Kathy is tough as nails and has the mettle to wait this out.



UPDATE:

YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN?

Check out this NY Times article on Senate Republicans blocking a vote on the nomination of Goodwin Liu to the Ninth Ciruit. Apparently, all because Liu spoke out against Alito's nomination to the Supreme Court. Such petty partisanship. But, this is the way the "game" is played in Washington.

Senator Jefferson Beauregard (I shit you not) Sessions, III, Republican of Alabama, said we don't need any slant-eyes on our courts, especially in California. Don't you remember Pearl Harbor? That's close to California! It would be an insult to put one of them on the court out there! “This nominee, I believe, represents an extraordinary circumstance. His record reveals that he believes the Constitution is a fluid, evolving document with no fixed meaning.”

Beauregard can hold a grudge. Remember 1986, when Ronnie nominated him to the District Court for the Southern District of Alabama? He didn't make it because FOUR of the assistants working under him when he was the US Attorney for the Southern District of Alabama testified that he made rascist comments to them.

Don't believe me?

One of those lawyers, J. Gerald Hebert, testified that Sessions had referred to the National Association for the Advancement of Colored People (NAACP) and the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) as "un-American" and "Communist-inspired" because they "forced civil rights down the throats of people."

Thomas Figures, a black Assistant U.S. Attorney, testified that Sessions said he thought the Klan was "OK until I found out they smoked pot." Sessions also called Mr. Figures "boy" and told him to be careful what he said to white folks. In his defense, little Jeffy said that "his remarks were taken out of context or meant in jest." Really, you in-bred, backwater rascist weasel? HAHAHAHA just kidding! That's a joke, Beau! Please don't take it out of context!

This guy would call Jeff Sessions a dipshit. I am not calling Jeff Sessions a dipshit. Nor would I ever call Jeff Session a dipshit. I think that calling Jeff Sessions a dipshit, would be inappropriate.

He's just an angry little man, who has become more sophisticated in plying his anti-American obstructionism and zealot agenda.

Sweet Home Alabama, indeed.

Broward Chief Judge Victor Tobin to Practice Foreclosure Law!

At the Law Offices of Marshall C. Watson, no less.

Who in their right mind could turn down that gig?

Obviously the Chief will do well and we wish him well. If we may, here are a few tips to insure your instant success upon your return to practice.

Heck, the Chief already has the newest buzz phrases down pat. Check out this quote from the DBR:

“Number one, it’s a firm that has a need. Number two, it’s a good fit for me. It’s an opportunity for me to carry on some of what I’ve done in the courthouse to see that best practices are used. They instituted a best-practices policy, and I’m going to make sure that is followed and make sure we do everything right,” he said

Best practices? Really? The Attorney General did not think so.

Despite his homicidal disdain for our blog we share Rumpole's opinion of BroweirdBroward.

N.B. Chief - trilogies. What is number $ 3?

"Ace" Miami Traffic Attorney Richard Hersch Talks Tough!!

"They Have to Get Through Us , Before They Get to You!"

No, really.

That's what Ace says. (Hey - that's what Richie's pal Rumpole calls him.)

Says so right here.

That's his marketing strategy.

Well, that and his associate LaSonya K. Lacey, who is plastered all over his website.

Except I wonder if his clients have seen this quote from Richie in today's Herald.

Defense lawyer Richard Hersch called Miami-Dade’s new DUI Diversion program a “good thing.”

“The vast majority of first DUIs are people who make stupid mistakes. Turning them into criminals doesn’t make any sense. A good number of them are going to get off because an officer doesn’t show, and evidence falls apart. What happens to those people? They’re not on the radar, and they’re not going to get treatment,” Hersh said.

Hmm.

So maybe the quote on Richard Hersch's website should be changed to read:

"They Have to Get Through Us, Before They Get To You! Unless They Ask Us Nicely! Or Unless I Think You Made a Stupid Mistake! Or Unless I Think You Need to Be a Criminal! Or Unless I Think You Need to be "On the Radar." Or unless I want to help the prosecution because its not fair to them that their evidence is "falling apart." Or Unless I Think You Need Treatment!"

You know, I am not a criminal attorney, so when I hear the term "get off" it conjures certain images. But I have never heard criminal defense lawyers use the phrase "get off on a technicality." Usually they corner me at the bar, pour tequila and invade my space while passionately talking about concepts I remember from law school, like "constitutional guarantees," "burden of proof", and "reasonable doubt."

The JNC might want reconciliation of Mr. Hersch's Oath of Attorney and his desire to be appointed to the bench.

N.B.: Ode to Lacey Underall

BREAKING NEWS! KIM ROTHSTEIN TO RETURN ALL OF SCOTTY'S PERSONAL ITEMS!

The Daily Business Review reports that there are "two intriguing items on the list: a box of "fetish wear" and a framed copy of the "Lawyer's Creed."

You can read the entire story here.

I Can Assure You My Intentions Are Strictly Honorable

All this talk about Judge Ungaro's order tossing the Bank Atlantic verdict just affirms what I knew all along: Judge Ungaro is super Hot Judge Ungaro may initially appear to want to attack you on certain issues you raise, depending on who you are, but if you stay focused, don't take the bait and don't get frustrated, she will study the law and if you raise persuasive issues will rule correctly, including reversing herself. And I am a big fan of watching that, beg your pardon.

She is smart, doesn't suffer fools, enjoys a good spat, is sartorially elegant and doesn't hold a grudge.

What more could you want in a woman in a Judge?

Kendall Coffey Sinks His Teeth Into Florida Rule of Evidence 90.803(25)a.ii.

I thought I'd followed closely Miami Voice's recall effort of Natacha. But somehow I did not know that Michael "Lou" Pizzi had previously led an unsuccessful Natacha recall effort. ( I just love saying that....NATACHAAAAAAAA...)

The Herald covers the drama here. So like, doesn't it seem a little less like Mikey is co-counsel to Big Ben, and a little more like Mikey hired Ben this time around to make sure things did not go south? Again.

Anyhoo, back to Natacha's depo. According to the Herald, Pizzi and Natacha really got into it. Can't wait for video, live at 5.

Natacha's attorney is non other than Kendall Coffey! You remember him, right?

No? Let me try to refresh your recollection.

He has attempted to stage a comeback by pushing his visibility through various publicity stunts.

First, he served as a CNN commentator on Eliot Spitzer's fall from grace for cheating on his wife and daughters and lying about being a prostitute's trick. Our own Glenn Garvin outed Kendall for his, er, "superior qualifications" for the gig. (One wonders if Garvin would have chimed in were Kendall a republican.)

Kendall's next publicity stunt was real early in the Rothstein Ponzi fraud, before he had any reasonable opportunity to understand the complex facts. Come on you remember! He took his client's word and invited the cameras in and shared his defense theories and gave a tour of the firm! Cool!

And don't forget the book!

Heck, I could go on and on with Ken's self-prooting publicity stunts - but why bother? Just check out his website.

Which brings us back to our evidence lesson for today. According to the Herald, in his depo defense of Natacha, Kendall cites the oft overlooked 90.803(25)a.ii. objection: "Kendall Coffey, Seijas’ attorney, repeatedly objected to Pizzi’s line of questioning, accusing him of a politically motivated “publicity stunt.’’

Wasn't Ben co-counsel with Ken for Gore, in the recount?

N.B.: I wonder how Ben is holding up.

The Faustian Tale of David Stern

I knew David when he was nobody, and heck, that seems like almost yesterday.

But now he's all over the news! Heck, he's featured in the Washington Post!

Let's see:

Plush, marble floored offices with glass and fountains? Check.

60 million in personal real estate? Check

Bugatti, Ferrari, Bentley? Check.

Bombshell wife? Check.

Yacht? Check.

Shit out of luck? Looks that way.

The dude has all 50 attorneys general on his ass. Not even Madoff can say that.

Michelle Conlin puts out some great journalism in the Post article.

Here's Dave, in happier days.



N.B.: Note the wristband from the prior evening's all-you-can-drink wet T-shirt contest.